More eats

Ord Noodle (Thai Town)
Somewhere in a cave in northern Thailand, or maybe in some monastery, or maybe in a Bangkok prostitute's suitcase is a secret box containing the recipes for the first two noodle dishes at Ord Noodle. At least that's how I imagine it. "Number one dry, and number two wet." Or maybe it's the other way around. That's the way I order when I don't mistakenly order the less transcendent sukiyaki instead. Medium spice, which is usually more than enough. Taken apart the dishes are micro-repositories of complex spices, sensation-inducers and flavors that might be allowed to speak for a country if an ambassador was busy. Together, they're pretty much the Thai version of McCartney and Lennon. Order a Thai iced tea, sit back in the Eames chairs, and wander around the collage of pictures on the wall. Don't worry about taking it all in the first time as you'll probably be back.

Wahoo's (Everywhere)
Where I head when I don't really want to make a decision. Nothing really brilliant, just clean tasting fish burritos and tacos with a rice and white bean option you should definitely exercise. I'm guessing the skatecore/polaroid design scheme would have been nice when I was 12. Now it's kind of whatever.

El Parian (Los Angeles)
I can be kind of a pussy when it comes to certain foods. I'll try congealed blood cubes. Or grasshoppers. Probably even cow testicles if the opportunity arose. But there's something about dishes that seem to cross way past the far frontiers of heart healthy that pushes me away. The birria at El Parian, cuts of goat drowning in a large bowl of liquid, artery clogging, fat droppings, is one of those. I opted instead for the goat tacos, a seemingly healthy alternative of kid laid out with cilantro and onion on perfectly crafted tortillas with radish on the side. Maybe I saved a few minutes off my life. Maybe not. Was it worth it? Maybe I should ask my friend Will, who actually had the balls to try the real stuff.